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The Search for Work-Life Balance

San Diego experts give advice on finding personal harmony

With BlackBerrys, e-mails and to-do lists, there is never a shortage of reminders of everything that needs to be done—just a shortage of time in which to do them. With workweeks stretching up to 80 hours now commonplace, everyone from professionals to homemakers has begun to aim for a sense of balance between work and the rest of the day.

While achieving work-life balance isn’t rocket science, it does require a healthy dose of attention to choices. It could be as simple as establishing a list of priorities, removing clutter or keeping a journal to tune into what’s really important to you.

Discover Your Priorities

Wasn’t technology supposed to deliver us into a new age of leisure time? Perhaps. But it hasn’t worked out that way. “Technology has created the expectation that everyone can do more, because the e-mail wants to be answered right away, not three days later,” says Dr. Tracy Wutzke, director of Harmonium Counseling Services in San Diego. “People feel overwhelmed because there’s pressure to do a lot more, but without any more time.”

With this constant demand on our time, finding out whether you need to improve the balance between work and the rest of your life can be as simple as taking your emotional temperature. “The issue is to know if you feel balanced,” says Wutzke. “How do we feel balanced while working, raising kids, tending to a household, having a relationship? And how [do you] feel like you’re putting enough time and energy into each of those places?” It’s a matter of whether your time is going toward your priorities, she says.

Without a clear sense of personal priorities, Wutzke says there can be serious consequences. “That’s where being a workaholic with 70- and 80-hour workweeks comes from,” she says. “People say, ‘Because I work so hard I deserve other things.’ So they might be drinking, or getting overweight or not exercising. And that throws them even more out of balance, to where they develop actual symptoms like migraines, fatigue or substance abuse.”

Since even the healthiest person is grappling with the same 24 hours in a day—which is supposed to include six to eight hours of sleeping—Wutzke says we should be clear about what we’re doing with that “chunk of time in the middle.”

“Depending on your situation—if you’re married, or have children or are a single parent—identify the most important thing you can be doing,” Wutzke explains. “If your priority is family, maybe you want to spend more time with your kids.” Once you’ve established a priority, activities should suggest themselves. “If you’ve identified the kids as a priority, maybe [you can organize] an outing to the park or going swimming.”

When it comes to purely personal time, don’t discard any amount of time, no matter how small. “Even if you only have a short period of time—even 15 minutes, any time is better than no time,” Wutzke says.

Manage Your Things

Some people are overwhelmed by the sheer volume of their stuff. Decluttering can be a powerful influence in work-life balance, says Jan Davis, a professional organizer and organizing force behind her “ClutterBye” decluttering service. Davis’ services run from organizing files to helping clean out your garage.

“If they’re overwhelmed with stuff, sometimes they don’t want to deal with it, so they hide at work to avoid being at home because too much stuff or obsession with stuff interferes with relationships, which causes stress,” says Davis, a member of the National Association of Professional Organizers.

Davis came upon her calling while organizing departments in corporate America and figured there existed a market for personal uncluttering and organization.

One piece of advice she offers is to discard old stuff when something new comes in the house. “It used to be when something broke, you fixed it,” Davis explains. “Things got more inexpensive, so now you go out and buy a new one, but don’t get rid of the old one. When a new thing comes in the house, an old thing needs to go out.”

Davis also advises that when families whose kids have so many toys that the children don’t know which one to play with first, the toys may be rotated to restore order. Or, ask family members to help control the amount of stuff that piles up by purchasing “consumables” for special occasions, such as movie tickets or a gift card to a restaurant, for example, rather than a gift that will likely get stashed away.

Master Your Time

The solution to the various time bandits in our lives is to become a master of time, says Jon Christopher “JC” Sosa, a certified career and life coach. Sosa says the key to work-life balance is in becoming “über-organized,” combined with multitasking and delegating whenever possible.

For example, divide your to-do list into “A” tasks (crucial to get done today), “B” tasks (important to do but could wait until the next day) and “C” items that can wait even longer. The “A” list is then ranked in order of importance. Sosa also recommends journaling. “[By] writing down thoughts that are important to you, you now have priorities.”

Being über-organized might also include building in time buffers to avoid getting caught up in time traffic jams. “I always allow 20 minutes before and after a client meeting,” says Sosa, in case it goes overtime or something unexpected comes up.

Delegation can also free up time. “If you don’t have time to clean your house, hire a service,” he says, “and find other services that deliver, like a dry cleaner, or shop online for groceries.”

While television has earned its reputation as a thief of time, it can be judiciously blended into a balanced life. For example, multitask by watching TV while knocking out some sit-ups. “I see TV as being an asset to a degree,” Wutzke says. “Watching TV can help people bond because it’s part of our culture.” But not every night, and not when it takes the place of other activities such as going for a walk, having neighbors over and connecting with other humans.

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